Navigating the Gift-giving Minefield
[by Charles Gupton]
This time of the year between Thanksgiving and Christmas draws our attention to not only giving thanks for the rich blessings in our lives, but saying “thank you” to people who’ve helped us make progress in our lives during the year. But it can be a very awkward time because of the potential implications that can accompany the gift-giving process. Where company guidelines don’t set clear boundaries, what seems like a simple act of saying “I appreciate you!” can become a minefield.
While reading “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman many years ago, I quickly realized that understanding how to show someone that they are appreciated had implications far beyond trying to improve my own marriage. The premise of the book is that everybody has a primary means of “hearing” that they are loved or appreciated, and that they tend to use their primary language as they communicate their feelings to others, as well. The five languages are:
• Words of affirmation
• Receiving gifts
• Acts of service
• Quality time
• Physical touch
Although it takes some observation, learning how to communicate to the people around us that they are appreciated can help build a deeper, trusting relationship with them. For example, if a client you want to say “thanks” to values quality time with her spouse, she may appreciate a gift card to a quiet restaurant more than a beautiful vase of flowers or a signed print. For someone who values acts of service, a gift of ten hours from an errand service would probably mean more than a case of wine.
This may seem to be a no-brainer, but in our rush to get something done, we often look at the solution based on what we value rather than what the receiver might deem most significant. What do you think?
2 Responses to 'Navigating the Gift-giving Minefield'
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Excellent post, Charles! I loved that book as well. I totally agree.
I also like the viewpoint as it again underscores a basic business principle that is so simple it is often overlooked: Know your customer.
The more we understand the needs and expectations of our clients and meet THEIR needs vs. trying to engage them only from OUR perspective, the better business people, photo marketers, effective communicators, and thoughtful human beings
we will become.
Great thought !The details you have given about the languages that we must understand. Its very useful for me because i have just started new business and have to deal with different clients.Thanks..